Appreciation in Marriage - NikahExplorer
Whereas we all give great importance to love, communication, patience and compromise in marriage, another factor that is hardly ever mentioned is appreciation towards your spouse in marriage. In Islam a great deal of importance has been laid on appreciating the spouse because when Allah talked about the union of marriage He talked about the helping each other in togetherness. The only way that can be achieved is when spouse appreciates the other for what they do.
Allah has no doubt created separate roles for both the husband and the wife in Islam. He has asked the Man to be the “protector and maintainer” of women and to provide for their families and He has asked the woman to take care of their family, the offspring and the home they build together. However, Allah has not made it a hard and fast rule. The wife, for example, has in her right to not cook for the husband. The fact that she does it is her appreciating the efforts of her husband who has worked all day at office and will come home tired. In the same way, it is not important for the husband to help the wife when she is cooking. But he DOES it in appreciating the fact that his wife has worked all day raising the kids
THIS is the sort of appreciation that is needed in Muslim Marriages today. There is a tradition that when Hazrat Mohammad (PBUH) visited his daughter’s house after her marriage he saw her husband helping her with the dishes in the kitchen, he was extremely pleased with him. This showed that the husband appreciated the work that his wife did. He accepted her deeds even though she may have had faults.
Wives, in the same way, should also appreciate the efforts of their husband because at the end of the say it is he who is supporting the family financially. The Holy Prophet (PBUH) said “On the Day of Judgment, Allah will not look upon the woman who has been ungrateful to her husband.” (Al-Hakim) Do not reach a point in your marriage where nothing your spouse ever does has any meaning for you. Learn to be happy in the little things done and appreciate more, smile more and give pats on the back more.