Feelings versus Faith in Marriage - NikahExplorer
In all relationships and especially that of a husband and a wife, feelings reign over everything else and the man and the woman are swept away by them, whether they are positive feelings of love or the extreme negative feelings of dislike. As humans, feelings are a part of us, put in us by Allah for a purpose. However, just like some things are allowed in Islam and others are forbidden, so must we be careful of our feelings and of exposing them to extremes.
In the relationship of marriage, hence, we must take control of our feelings. Allah has made the relationship of a husband of a wife as that of being “garments of each other”. This means that not only are the husband and wife to share their life with each other but to protect each other, keep each other’s secrets and to be intimate with each other as prescribed by Allah. In all of this they must be careful not to spill over their feelings in a way that they let their feelings define their relationship. However, this is a dangerous trick of the shaitaan to lure loving couples away from the path of Allah. This is because when feelings rule the day, expectations arise, and when expectations arise, a husband or a wife will get disappointed as humans can never live upto expectations. Expectations are only sought from Allah. When a husband or wife does not live upto expectations as a result of feelings, marriages get destroyed. That is why it is dangerous to rely on feelings rather than the faith in Allah.
Married couples, more than feelings, should rely on the faith they have towards Islam and Allah. Feelings may change eventually but the faith in Allah remains strong and unwavering and that is what will eventually count in your married life. When you have faith in Allah and the relationship, Allah will automatically make it easy for you to carry out the relationship. So figure out your faith and you will yourself gain control of your feelings inshAllah.