Is your Muslim Spouse perfect? - NikahExplorer
No they are not. Are neither are you. No, really you’re not, no matter how much you claim to be a “perfectionist”. You’re not. Nor is your spouse. Nor will they ever be. This is how it is and this is how we must accept it. But why are we not perfect? If Allah, the most perfect Being ever created us then why are we not perfect? And why are our spouses not perfect? The answer is very simple.
We as Allah’s creation are perfect. But Allah did not create us for this world. He Subhanwatalla created us for Jannah. And Jannah is where we shall be perfect. Right now we are living in dunya, dunya a place with all its imperfections and uncertainties. Allah has told us again and again that our true home is Jannah, then how can we be perfect here?
We cannot. Even Allah knows and that is the exact reason that he has also created the attribute of “forgiveness”. For when we are not perfect we make mistakes and when we make mistakes we ask for forgiveness and when we ask for forgiveness Allah forgives. That is our relationship with Allah. That of love, caring and forgiveness. It’s a give and take relationship.
In the same way we must not expect our Muslim spouse to be perfect. Your husband or your wife is perfect only for Jannah, but in this world you WILL see their imperfections just like they will see yours. You WILL not get long, you will have disagreements, you will fight over trivial matters and you WILL be harsh. But you will ALSO make up after a fight, you will ALSO hug your spouse after they forgive you and you will ALSO show them compassion amidst the tears.
So when you are looking for a Muslim partner to marry, don’t look for a perfect person. Because like I said, perfect people don’t exist in this world. Look for a person whose perfection MATCHES yours. Who is as perfect and as imperfect as you! Look for someone who can drive you mad and yet make you adore them at the same time. Marry someone who you love inspite of not liking so many things about them. And then accept them the way they are, with all their imperfections and flaws and everything else that Allah has created them with for this world. And when you decide to do that you have blessed your marriage because Allah is looking at it with love and mercy.