Spouses in Family Gatherings - NikahExplorer

“He comes home late, he’s hardly ever there for the kids!” and “She keeps the house so dirty it’s a miracle I’m wearing clean clothes today…” are often phrases husbands and wives use frivolously at gatherings when describing their spouses. While the statements are uttered in complete humor (though not always) people may take them very seriously and develop a poor opinion of the spouse in question. That is why Allah has asked us to use our words wisely, even in the form of jokes, for they have the power to ruin relationships, and for such a great relationship as marriage, such bad mouthing is not needed.  When a Muslim man and wife are in family gatherings, they must take great care not to utter unpleasantness about their spouses, be it even in a joking manner.

When Allah describes the relationship between a husband and a wife He uses the phrase “they are your garments and you are their garments”. This means that in Islam a husband a wife are to live with each other in protection, love and support each other in difficult times. The word garments also means to hide each other’s faults in front of other people. Your husband and your wife have the greatest right on you and that includes ensuring that their self respect is intact in front of your entire family. What happens between the husband and the wife in their own closed doors should not be spread within extended family as this not only gives you yourself a bad image (in the eyes of people as well as Allah) but also breaks the promise you made at marriage, that of being your spouse’s garment, of protecting them and their deeds.

Such statements and words spoken at family gatherings can destroy relationships. They can tear down the trust between spouses. Respect your spouse in family gatherings. Do not make them feel embarrassed in front of friends. Learn to protect your spouse in every way. It will make your marriage one that is on the right path towards Allah’s pleasure.