Compassion and Respect Greater than Love in Marriage - NikahExplorer
Sure, marriages need love, not only when they begin but throughout the lifespan of the relationship. Muslim husbands and wives must therefore ensure they keep the spark in their marriage alive by creating new ideas and instances to show love to each other. Allah has himself said that He has brought a man and woman together so that they live together in love, peace and harmony.
So whereas love is extremely important for a marriage to work, what we as Muslims should focus on more is compassion and respect towards our spouses. And this is not only one way, mind you. Husbands and wives are both asked by Allah to show compassion and respect to their spouses. Respect does not only mean being obedient to the needs of the spouse rather it covers a broad spectrum. Respect means caring for the opinions of our spouse, listening to them with patience, and giving our spouse’s worthy advice time to time. This is not limited to only the wives, rather the husbands too must show this level of respect to their wives.
In the same way compassion is an attribute that has varying facets to it. Showing compassion to your spouse does not mean just professing your love to them (though ofcourse that is important too!). It means empathizing with them, supporting them when they need you the most and loving them regardless of their shortcomings. It means caring for them when they feel down and solving their problems when they come to you for help. That is true compassion.
Compassion and respect though cannot be shown independently and is obviously a by-product of love. When you love your spouse, respect and compassion would come automatically. A husband cannot claim to love his wife if he slanders and abuses her for example, nor can the wife claim to be compassionate if she disrespects the values most important to her husband. That is why compassion and respect in marriage are important attributes and ones that will take you to Jannah along with your spouse if you follow them. May Allah enable all of us to do so.